The arrival of a dark time also marks the beginning of new era. Whenever something bad happened to me, such as when I am dissappointed with something.. something new would also happen because you would swear to do something different isn't ?
You sweared that you would do this and tat ?? in order to remember that what have caused you to feel upset doesn't repeat itself. Just like when it is nite time and you prepare youself to sleep... and then you wake up and it is a brand new day.If you didn't sleep, it is not brand new day, just only morning.
Yesterday, I have an argument with my father.. and it made me feel so sad that I just want to give up on him.. give up trying to make him feel happier. I really feel that 26 years is enough. I remember when I was younger, you would always wanted to make your parents feel proud abt you.. I mean you try to get good score and etc.. after you started working, you tried to buy them things and etc.. to remind them that the investment is worth it. and so I have been doing this sort of "pay-back" thingy for 26 years.. and I felt that it would do.
I started to understand what kind of courage people have in order for them to leave home and pursue other interest in other environment. Just imagine for someone to land on a place totally new and stranger to him or her and start from zero. It is just exactly the opposite kind of feeling as when you think otherwise.
I needed courage and not anger.